I have eyes always fixed on the east

January 6
I have eyes always fixed on the east, in the middle of the night around him, to distinguish miraculous star that he led them to the cave of Bethlehem. But in vain do I fix my eyes to see this star appear brighter. The more I look, the less fail to see, the more effort and more earnestly I seek you, the more I am involved in more darkness. Day I am alone, I'm alone at night, and no ray of light comes to light, never a drop of refreshing comes to fan a flame that consumes me continually, never consume me.
Only once have felt, in the most intimate and secret of my mind, something very delicate that I can not explain. The soul began to feel his presence, unable to see her, and then, I'll say so, he approached so closely to my soul that it clearly warned his touch, exactly - to give a pale face - as often happens when our body touches closely another body.
I can not say anything about it, only I confess that at first, I fell into a great panic, but that this panic, gradually was transformed into a heavenly euphoria. I found that I no longer was in a state of passer, and I could not tell if, when this happened, I realized it or not that was still in my own body. Only God knows, and I would not know anything else to give a better understanding of this event.
(March 8, 1916, Fr Benedict of San Marco in Lamis - Letter's. I, p. 756)