My God, my shield and rock in me under

June 20


Yes, my father, I am deprived of everything, even the appearance of virtue, so much to seem to be a fatal lukewarm state, by which God will just reject me your heart every day. And I feel that my doom is irreparable, and can not find way out of this.Woe is me, I lost the road, the media, support, standards, and if I try to wake my mind off, I get this a mysterious dispersion, and I feel more lost than before, more unable to rise , and the mysterious darkness thickens. My God, why do you shake and shake remuerdes and return to again and mystify so violently to this troubled soul, this soul destroyed in a while and whose destruction would say it is moved, it caused and loved by your own mandate and permission ? (June 19, 1918, Fr Benedict of San Marco in Lamis - Letters. I, p. 1033)