My God, take me to repentance

 My God, you know it, send to less light to guide me to discover what I can not find: the true source of many evils in your creature. I never had my faculties as unable and closed.What is this suffering for the will, memory and understanding! I think, for a will that seeks and desires at least willing good, is harsh and unconscionable suffering this penalty.
And similarly, for whom, enriched with many memories of God's greatness in their attributes and rights, and in relation to itself, of its obligations and the veneration due to its creator, death is suffering from an inability to understand what is discovered after mysteriously. [...].
The understanding is as crushed under the die, and, although it has a lot of knowledge, is blind, blind as a painful experience that only those who may say something true about it. And above all, so it seems to me, is absolutely unbearable suffering to an understanding that, from the beginning of its activity, the tests have become more clever and then wins the luminosísimos ray contrast of true life.
My God, take me to repentance, Make me a sincere contrition and conversion firm my heart to you.
  (September 5, 1918, to Father Benedict of San Marco in Lamis - Letters. I, p. 1071)